In Defense of 'Super Pop'

In case you couldn't tell, I love Madonna.

I love how She changes. I love that She's sustained Her career for well over twenty years. I love Her sense of style and Her obvious delight in creative adventures. I love that She advocates diversity and tolerance. I love that I can debate the merits of Madonna with anyone, something that is put to the test on a regular basis.

There are certain aspects of Madonna's career, however, that even I can't, in good conscience, defend.

For instance, take these fashion faux pas (please!).

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Exhibit C:

Contrary to the above evidence, the woman is nearly always impeccably put together.

In the realm of Her raison d'etat, too, She rarely flubs. You gotta hand it to Her: The songs are works of art. Her lyrics are great.

Except these:

If I was an animal, I'd be a lion
If I was a car, I'd be an Aston Martin
If I was a genius, I'd be Isaac Newton
If I was a hero, I'd be Martin Luther

If you want to reach the top (reach the top)
If you do, you'll never stop (never stop)
(The top)

If I was an actor, I'd be Marlon Brando (the top)
If I was a painter, I'd be Frida Kahlo (the top)
If I was a drink, I'd be a lemon drop (the top)
If I was a song, I would be super pop

If you want to reach the top (reach the top)
If you do, you'll never stop (never stop)
If you want to reach the top (reach the top)
If you do, you'll never stop (never stop)
(The top)

If I was a star, I would be who I am today
If I was a fighter, I'd be Cassius Clay
If I was emotion, I would be intense
If I was a man, I would be president

I'll be different
If I'm the president
I'll be different
If I'm the president

If I was an animal, I'd be a dog
If I was a dog, I would be a man
If I was a man, I'd be the president
If I was the president, I'd be different

If you want, you can reach the top (reach the top)
If you do, you'll never stop (never stop)
If you want, you can reach the top (reach the top)
If you do, you'll never stop (never stop)
(The top)

If you want to reach the top
You would start and never stop (never stop - the top)
If you want to reach the top
You would start and never stop (never stop)

If you want to reach the top (never stop)
You would start and never stop (never stop - the top)
(Reach the top - if you want you can reach the top - never stop)
(Reach the top - if you want you can reach the top - never stop)
(Reach the top - if you want you can reach the top - never stop)

Still with me? Ouch, right?

These are the lyrics to Super Pop, the "bonus" track that was sent to ICON members right when Confessions on a Dance Floor was released. While it is plain to most why the song was omitted from the playlist of the album, let me be one of the first to stand up and say I actually like the song. And I can concede when Madonna doesn't quite hit musically (Amazing, Jimmy Jimmy, Mer Girl).

You need to hear (or re-hear, as the case may be) the file. It's got a great beat and, if you ignore the insipid lyrics, a catchy chorus. Ignore the "ooh yeah" bridge, the awkward political commentary, and the - sigh - barking dog effect. What you're left with is a surprisingly well-produced throwaway that could've been a crunchy club anthem.

When the rumors of a tour name were swirling, I had heard "Super Pop" was considered. Having virtually ignored the track after one or two post-release spins, I revisited it to see why it might be the centerpiece of the new tour, besides its obvious, U2-esque tour-ready name.

When the Confessions Tour was officially announced and Super Pop relegated to fleeting fan-only nugget garnering roughly zero buzz and only a mention in an MSNBC article, the song still remained on my iPod. And it grew on me. I found myself humming the chorus and replaying the plunking chords underlying the song. It actually builds into something, layering a simple bass into a more complex work, employing multiple vocal tracks, heavy percussion, and what sound like strings.

At the very least, we can all agree She got one line right: "If I was a star, I would be who I am today." No, Madge, it doesn't get more "super pop" than You.